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Post by Ryan Green. on Mar 8, 2008 23:23:42 GMT -5
are you there?a r e y o u w a t c h i n g m e ?
she heaved a heavy breath, pushing it out into the cool air around her. the porcelin of her cheeks was streaked with salty tear tracks, her eyes where bloodshot and watery, and her mind was running a million thoughts a minute. she missed her brother absolutely every day, but today, the day after the one year marking of the accident, she was feeling the grief even more than usual. his voice, his laughter, and images of him where cluttered in her head, and she didn't have the will power to get rid of them. no matter how horribly sad they made her, she couldn't bare to make them leave. because then, maybe... she wouldn't be able to get them back. and that would be the worst pain of all.
the sun was beginning to approach the horizon, which was laid out in front of her, and she had been sitting on the sand for almost an hour. it was only mere hours ago that she had run out on a friendly, and maybe even flirtatious, conversation with someone she had met in a cafe. his name had been drake, and she had actually had a genuinely good time with him when they had been talking, and not bickering. but then you went and fucked that up, she whispered under her breath, taking another deep breath in and wiping away brimming tears from her eyelashes before they could roll down her cheeks.
ryan had gone back to her dorm room and changed before she had wandered out onto the beach. she had taken off her skirt and put on a pair of denim skinnies, a simple, orange tee, and her brother james' zippy sweatshirt, which was a faded grey. the sweatshirt had his scent on it, and she never wanted to forget that. her hair was exactly how it had been: neat, straight, and simple. her mascara had run a bit from the bits of crying she had done over the course of the day, and she had finally just removed it all together. she didn't need it anyway. hell, she was very much alone right now.
i miss you, she said out loud to whomever happened to be listening. she hoped that her brother was there, watching her, and listening to what she had to say. she had spoken to him earlier, but now, felt like just thinking. although those last three words had triggered her emotions once more, and she shook gently as her emotions poured out. i miss you so much, she managed to gasp through her tears. wiping her eyes slowly, ryan then laid back into the sand, her arms above her head, and her toes being repeatedly touched by the gentle waves. she stared up at the colorful sky, her eyes watery, which blurred her vision a bit. as she closed her eyes, the salty tears where pushed out, and ran quickly down her temples and into her hair.
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Post by Drake Farvall on Mar 9, 2008 20:08:02 GMT -5
His frame pulled easily over the stretch of sand. It was his normal thing, relieving stress by running down the road, in a field, or now down a beach. He let his sneakers now filling up with sand move up and down through the soupy substance. His frame jolted here and there as let himself absorbed the shock that filtered up through his body. His bottom half clothed with stonewashed jeans, the knees were ripped a bit since they were his older working jeans. His torso had been covered with a tank top. Black in coloration now hung through the side of his belt.
The hot California sun burned against his back as it dove down to the horizon. He could feel the tide coming in quicker now as it was filling up his sneakers every time he landed a few steps. He slowed down as he could see someone lying on the beach. He really didn’t pay much mind to it until he noticed who it was. Maybe I should just turn around and go back he thought to himself a loud but where no one could her him. Until he noticed her words, I miss you. At this he knew she wasn't talking of himself, but was she ok.
He could hear her sobs gently flowing out as he approached with caution. See now darling i know i didn’t do this to you, now tell me whats wrong.... He broke off as he looked at her and let his shackles bend as he sat upon the sand beside of her. He looked at the stream of steady tears dropping down her cheeks as he began to grow more concerned at her. I know you don’t know me and i don’t really know you, but what I do know is that, it helps to talk about it...I don’t care if you bawl your eyes out or not. He ment that in the best way, he knew something was wrong, but what could it be? He dared to sit beside of her now and ask what she cried about. |
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Post by Ryan Green. on Mar 9, 2008 20:28:53 GMT -5
the girl's lean frame quickly straightened up into a sitting position at the presence of someone else next to her. her finger tips wiped away the liquid which dampened her cheeks, in a simple last-ditch attempt to have him see her decently. ryan heaved a sigh, staring over at the guy she easily recalled as drake as he spoke. she was able, thankfully, to hold in her tears for now, listening as he spoke, but not longer watching him. her green eyes where staring out at the horizon, which had lost the illumination of the sun, and who's colors where now fading from their original vibrant tones into black.
ryan pushed her hair behind her ears as she drew her knees up closer to her chest. there where a few moments of silence after drake finished speaking, simply because ryan didn't know what to do. should she embrace the shoulder of a stranger, or push him away once more. obviously, if he had come back to her after what she had pulled earlier, he wasn't a completely horrible person. anyone else could have, and probably should have, walked away and simply let her be alone. but here was drake, trying to understand what had her so troubled. with a deep rattling breath in, she spoke, keeping her wet eyes locked on the horizon, my brother's dead. ryan was forced to pause for a moment, breathing through her slightly ajar lips. she didn't wipe away the single tear that trickled to the peak of her cheek bone. he died a year ago yesterday. with the words finally out of her mind, the teen turned her face towards her companion, her lips drawn into a small line, and her emotions struggling to escape her. ryan's eyes where wet, and filled with an immense pain that could never be erased. and i miss him so much, drake.
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Post by Drake Farvall on Mar 9, 2008 20:39:07 GMT -5
His voids just watched her as he looked onward at the horizon. He sighed a bit as he began to think she probably wouldn’t confined into him, though he knew not why other than he was just a miniscule person who had met her earlier. He looked at the setting sun that dipped lowly into the sky as his sneakers felt the next rush of the evenings tide come over the toes of them. He looked to the sand as he picked up the star shaped shale that had washed up between his limbs. His palms held it for a moment before he began to listen to her.
Looking at her soaked cheeks he had to look away. It was hard to see someone miss family like that when he only wanted to get away from his own. Wow Ryan, I'm sorry. I honestly can’t say I know how you feel, I for one never want to be around my family, but I do know it has to be hard. he looked to her now. His hand took hers for a moment and laid the shelled starfish into her hand. He smiled a bit as he wanted to make everything better for her, but he didn’t know how to do it. His breath came quietly and quickly as he looked to her. I’m here if you want to talk. He shrugged lightly to her. He was there for a stranger that had never met him but recently. |
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Post by Ryan Green. on Mar 9, 2008 21:01:26 GMT -5
thanks, ryan whispered a second or so after he had finished speaking. her fingers closed around the small shell he had placed in her hand, and she couldn't help but expose a small smile to him. she took a deep breath in, trying hard to find her words again. although she sat in silence for a few seconds, thinking over the options in front of her. she had already come out and admitted the fact that her brother had died, which she hadn't expected to reveal to anyone at canterbury so soon; so, why not talk it out with someone who was willing to listen? and, from what ryan could tell, actually was putting an honest effort in to caring about her issues.
are you sure you really wanna play therapist? she asked in a slightly louder voice, but still pretty clear of emotion. the teen didn't know how far she would go into detail with drake, but it would sure feel great to let some of the things on her mind out of her mouth. and having someone actually listen to her, and something that was able to respond, would be really helpful. plus, the fact that she and drake where practically strangers was mostly the reason she felt that she could confide in him with her thoughts and feelings. he didn't know her, that was the point.
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Post by Drake Farvall on Mar 9, 2008 21:24:02 GMT -5
He shrugged his shoulders gently pushed forward as he shifted his weight. Of course. I’ll listen to anything you have to say. He looked toward her in confidence as he waited for a moment If it makes you trust me more...ill confide in you as well and let you in on my life's story, though its far from great He looked over to her.
He began to wait, it was to be expected that she would take her time on this, loosing someone had to be hard. He himself didn’t know this feeling. He kept thinking back to his far from perfect life and how he wished now he hadn’t caused so many problems, but they caused his problems as well. Breath came out toward the waves casting shadows upon the ground easily. He returned gaze gently to the face that streamed the liquidous substance over the flushed cheeks. |
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Post by Ryan Green. on Mar 10, 2008 14:27:55 GMT -5
ryan stat quietly for a few seconds after drake had finished speaking; her body was still, but her eyes still leaked slow tears for her brother. she didn't know where to begin speaking. feeling slightly awkward, the teen pushed out a soft sigh, fingering the shell that the boy next to her had given to her just a few seconds previously. his name was james, ryan glanced back at drake as she began speaking, and then back out at the darkening water, he died in a campus fire at his school. her voice was coming out kind of slowly, struggling for enough words to explain herself, but not enough to make her even more of a mess than she already was. surely, drake didn't need that.
she felt done for now. like she had spilled enough of herself out loud for drake to hear. the girl's words may not have drawn a very vivid image for drake, but her mind was painting the pictures and memories for her. ryan could see the morgue images she had glanced at, the searing images of her eldest brother's charred and severely burned body scarring her mind. those images of his face would never leave her. she couldn't push herself any further. ryan cleared her throat, not leaving enough space between her final words for drake to say anything, and then her voice picked back up, so... enough of that, ryan forced a small laugh, wiping her eyes gently as she glanced over at drake. can i hear about you, instead?
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Post by Drake Farvall on Mar 10, 2008 19:40:00 GMT -5
He listened to her words. She had broken off in a short syllable. Frame adjusted in the sand as he sighed and began to part his own lips before subduing them again. Her next words, the part about him hit deep. He didn’t want to part with his history but he was beginning to really care for this stranger. By no means was this easy for him to do. It had all remained locked inside of his masculine torso for an entire life. He gave a sigh out as he looked to her dripping tears. He smiled a bit Id offer you my tank top but its a bit wet he shrugged as he looked to her.
He gave a bit of a sigh. His muscular physic was burning from where he had jogged and merely sat down instead of working out his build up heat. Me? oh well this is a story in a half. Oh, Imp sorry about your pain...it must be hard. He shut off his speech for a second taking in a deep breath of oxygen and expelling the stale carbon that bulged in his lungs. Ok, well i was forced to be perfect, perfect grades life etc all through ninth grade. I got so tired of my parents bickering at me to do the right thing, i had to be perfect in their eyes, it drove me insane. I started to draw away from all my friends and hang at the party scene. I hate to admit but i got into drugs badly and drinking. They hated it which made it more amusing to me until they shipped my sister off to a boarding school. She was the only one who understood me and that gave me a reality check. I quit cold turkey. I suffered in the long run from withdrawals and such but it seemed to make me that much stronger. Now they have sent me here, to make me "perfect" once more He shut off. He had given to much...or at least he thought.
Now thats just great, run her away from you. The first female you have met actually the first friend you have met and you just unload this all on her in her already horrid problems Great going dumbass. He shook his head sorry about that it just kind of all spilled out He said quickly as he looked back at her. His tone had changed from harsh in the story back to his same self. |
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Post by Ryan Green. on Mar 10, 2008 19:59:58 GMT -5
as he spoke, ryan listened carefully, her eyes shifting about his attractive face. she sighed, her voice not filled with biased judgment or a false sense of being able to relate to another's problems, but the tone of someone who had felt her life tumble down into the lowest of low once before, and could say simply that she knew how that felt, that must have.. been really hard. to quit, i mean. ryan's voice, at the moment, was a bit husky and quiet. the two sat just ten inches or so from each other, and nothing else but the calming sound of the crawling waves surrounded them. the girl's eyebrows furrowed a bit, her mind working quickly to find the right words to follow up on what she had said, from what i know, parents tend to have too big of expectations from all us kids. and when all we can do is try to live up to those expectations, all they seem to do is push and push, constantly asking for more. to the point until we can't take it anymore and just start to rebel. ryan's eyes remained watery, but the flow of tears had ceased. i'm sorry about your sister, she finished, biting the inside of her lip gently.
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Post by Drake Farvall on Mar 10, 2008 20:15:21 GMT -5
His own frame shifted lightly as he looked over at her. Yea, it was hard to quit, but it was for the better. I want to have a life, I want to be able to find a girl and one day settles\ down. One day that is He gave a slight smirk at his words, by no means was he ready to settle down and marry and what not. He looked over her in a gentle manner. yea, i have to say your right. I got to the breaking point. he sighed.
Hoping her view upon him heading changed he lifted his tank top from the loop of his belt and straightened it out. He replaced it over his chilling skin as the sun ducked even lower almost to s disappearing stance in the sky. His breath began to work in his chest up and down as he didn’t know really what to say now. He wanted to let her know he wanted it to be better for her. How could he do this. His mind reeled gently as he began to think. |
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Post by Ryan Green. on Mar 11, 2008 14:37:51 GMT -5
ryan smiled warmly and then turned her shoulders back towards the ocean, allowing the silence to grow between them. it wasn't really that awkward of a silence, for each was busy in their own thoughts. ryan, at least, felt a bit more at peace than she had before. the teen's fingers where curled around the cuffs of the sweatshirt she wore. as her hand rose towards her face, she brought the fabric close to her nose and inhaled her brother's scent. the edges of her lips rose into a small smile as he came back into her head in a pleasant, and short-lived, memory. ryan finally pressed her palms back into the sand, leaning back against her hands with a soft sigh.
as she sat there, she didn't feel pathetically alone anymore. the presence of drake helped to lift that feeling. her younger brother, whom had been her support system, was off creating a new life of his own at canterbury, and her parents where thousands of miles away, doing god know's what. the girl glanced over at drake after a good minute of silence, do you wanna go do something? ryan, regardless if drake went with her, felt like she needed to stop thinking about her brother. anything that would get her mind onto thoughts that created a more positive mood would be great. and a part of ryan desperately wanted drake to agree to go somewhere with her tonight.
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Post by Drake Farvall on Mar 11, 2008 14:46:18 GMT -5
Silence. The killer of all men. His breath rose and fell gently as he looked at the rolling waves. They seemed to carry on continuously, just rolling. His gaze was seemingly locked onto the rise and fall of the rampage. They were never the same some tall and long, others short and choppy. He gave a smile as he looked toward the female starting at them and hiding behind a shirt sleeve. His own arms shifted a bit as he made his comfort level a bit more his stance.
His head turned toward her as she spoke, the deadly silence was broken. Sure. Id love to do something with you he gave a smirk to her. He felt his heart beat once in his chest before he stretched his arms up. He looked forward to the last tiny ray of light that streamed over the horizon as he stood up dusting himself off a bit. His hand lent down to her for help up if she accepted while he spoke what did you have in mind? he questioned. It was really a surprise she had invited him after the story he had told her, who would? His hand remained there for her to take if she accepted the gesture of help as he finished his wording. |
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Post by Ryan Green. on Mar 11, 2008 14:54:08 GMT -5
ryan smirked sarcastically, understanding the other side of the comment that he had made about wanting to do something with her. or at least, that is the other side as she saw it right now. inside of her mind, she held back the thoughts that should have followed. taking drake's hand gently, she allowed him to help her up and onto her feet. glancing around them, ryan emitted a soft sigh as she thought quickly of the options she knew of around canterbury. unfortunately, nothing really came to mind. i don't know, exactly, what is there to do around here? she asked with a small smile, hoping that drake would be able to come up with an option to fill her void.
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Post by Drake Farvall on Mar 11, 2008 15:24:32 GMT -5
He pulled her light frame up easily as she stood he let his hand linger for a moment in hers. His eyes seemingly locked onto her own as he smiled lightly. well, I know they have places to eat, a mall, and I believe a theater nearby if any of that interests you? He asked. He wanted to find something she would be interested in to keep things from her mind.
Shoulders rolled back as he let his arms stretch upward and relieve the tension that had built up in them. His muscles gave a pull and released the clinches that had made them pain so. His shoulders popped lightly as he sighed aloud. His legs began to warm up as he shifted his weight for a moment before looking back to her. Smile came across his facade as he waited. |
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Post by Ryan Green. on Mar 11, 2008 17:44:58 GMT -5
the girl's heart beat a little bit faster as he let his hand linger upon her own, and she smiled simply, crossing her arms loosely once he had released her hand. ryan was, admittedly, the type of girl who spent her days, not chasing boys, but kissing them. she had hooked up a lot at her previous school, but nothing outrageous. also, most of the hookups were alcohol induced, and, if she was in a well enough state of mind, which was a majority of the time, she and whomever she had been with that night didn't go much farther than kissing. a whore? nah, she wasn't one. she was just... friendly? unafraid to be ambitious? but, as of right now, no one at canterbury knew that. the reality of being able to reinvent herself was enticing, but the temptation to grab him right then and there was even larger. ryan turned her head and stared off towards where the sand met grass, her voice beginning up again, housing a playful tone, my stomach is warning me that it's about to eat itself... so.. food would be great, if you're hungry. her eyes narrowed a bit as she showed him a small, but genuine smile.
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